Pirate Monkeys Inc.

Are you looking for high quality pirate merchandise at low, low prices? Then you'd better look somewhere else. But if you want shoddily made pirate junk for only slightly more than you'd pay at your local store, shipped directly to you in 6 to 8 weeks, then this is the place for you!
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Weapons
	Wooden Sword This handsome wooden sword is finely hand-crafted from the finest wooden sticks and some fine string.
	Deluxe Plastic Sword This shiny chrome-looking sword comes with a fancy gold-colored handle.
	Big Rock It may not look like much but this rock can come in mighty handy when you need something heavy to throw. Also useful as a paperweight!
	The Smacking Stick Good for smackin'!
	Deluxe Smacking Stick Smack people in style. (Magical powers not included.)
	Wooden Stake For those pesky vampires.
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Accessories
	Viking Hat Use this trusty helmet to protect your head and poke your enemies with the conveniently located pointy horns.
	Ship in a Bottle Here's a fine addition to any captain's cabin: the Ship in a Bottle, hand-made by pirate monkeys.
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Equipment
	Pirate Scope You can tell this authentic Pirate Scope is a genuine authentic pirate monkey Pirate Scope by the authentic skull-and-crossbones logo and the fact that is has "pirate scope" written on the side there. See it? Right there. Pirate Scope. Accept no substitutes. (Pirate scope may not actually magnify things).
	"Thank You" bag Why go a-pillagin' with an ordinary sack when you could instead use this handy plastic bag that has "Thank you" printed on it in big, friendly red letters? Your victims will appreciate that you went the extra mile to say "pirate monkeys care" and you'll love the convenient, built-in handles and durable, water-resistant plastic-like material. Stores a whole pile o' loot!
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Weapons

Accessories

Equipment